Inside the Soul of Speaking TruthRed Moon in the MakingCJFaivre, 2018, 30X30 Acrylic on CanvasEvery Full Moon brings two invitations. One is to let go of whatever it is in our life that no longer serves us, or that is harmful to us or to others.  The second invitation is to offer the gifts we carry within us to those whom our life touches.Most of us spend many moons learning to let go of what holds us back before we enter the space where we get a glimpse of what we can offer others.  Over time,  we spend more time in this space learning about the gifts of our own being.To Speak Truth requires we know this space.  I know this space as the 'heart of my soul'.  The story of my life is here.  I sit in the dark womb of this space with intention. In the dark my fingers are my eyes, and I read the stories of the life I have lived. They are marked on a red timeline in the heiroglyphics of my heart's own language.  Here I learn to read the Truth of my stories. Stories of my relatives are here, my ancestors, marked as thumprints of gold, they paint the walls of this sacred space. Touching these marks, I can read the Truth their stories have for me. A luminous cross of blessing is suspended in this space, and the wind of the Spirit blows through this space, refreshing both my life and my spirit. Tonight, as I sit in my soul space, on the eve of June's Full Moon, the Red Moon shines down on our country as citizens are marching, standing up, kneeling, lying down and crying out for life, for justice and for peace. I am grateful for my timeline of remembering, and for the history of my ancestors, and for the blessing and life-giving breath of Great Spirit.  May I learn from my history and the history of others. May we each visit the hearts of our souls and learn the gifts we have to offer and be willing Speak Truth.

Image: cj faivre; May Moon: Hear Truth 2020 Acrylic on Canvas 10X30This is a long post-It's been a long cycle!The fifth moon cycle invites us to become willing and attentive to Hearing Truth. The gift this moon cycle offers is the practice of patient listening.  In our current time of upheavel and uncertainty in our communities and countries, many voices are coming at us from many directions and sources.I know that for myself, it has not been easy to be patient when those voices are loud and persistant about their version of 'truth', or when the voices speak for and devision. By the time May's new moon began (April 22nd) there were already so many voices from so many sources, I often found myself in a state of uncertainty about where to set my trust for helpful guidance.  My days end in a weary kind of exhaustion.In inspiration for the May moon cycle painting came on an evening walk at the end of one of those days. It was the first non-rainy day of the cycle and the moon was showing a sliver of crescent. May's new cresent moon rose just above a convergence of electric poles, wires and an ancient elm at thecorner of Illinois and Summit streets; the planet Venus hung in the background, as if in witness.  I stopped and looked up, struck by the symbolism. Poles reaching to the sky as if in competition to reach the moon first. Wires crisscrossing in all directions, grandmother tree appeared to arch away from the chaos.  May Moon- Hear Truth-hung present, rising above, resting above, it all.I sensed this a powerful image, a lesson from Mother Moon. I determined to paint the visual gift she offered me.  As I painted over the course of the next ten days, her message for me became clearer:  In this age of quantum technology, there IS an onslaught of voices, from all directions.  Hearing what is Truth is complicated during this time.  May moon invites us to move through the cycle we are experiencing as she moves through her cycles. First by recognizing the newness of the cycle; next, in the waxing phase, take time to take without attachment what is being presented.  Then, in the light of the full moon we can focus and begin to discern what we are hearing. During the time of the waning moon as this cycle moves toward closure, she teaches us to shed what does not resonate as truth.Were are now at the the time of the 'closing moon', or 'dark' moon. we are invited to rest, to integrate what we now know, or perhaps to reflect on questions we may need to ask for more clarity. There will be time for this asking in the new moon to come when we experience the Moon of Speaking Truth. But for now,  Moon's message is to be patient, to observe what is unfolding, to let go of what does not resonate, to rest, and to listen for questions that will rise as we prepare to learn to Speak Truth.

I am thinking these days about what it would look like to walk around all day as a wise women.  Currently, being ‘wise’ feels more like an awareness that descends upon me, or into me, and I either have wisdom, or I don’t.  Fortunately-the “I don’t have it” times are usually relegated to something going on in me personally, rather than in my professional work—which is a VERY good thing! And, my personal struggles certainly bring understanding and compassion to my work as well.When I am not in my center, I don’t seem able access to wisdom—or it is very difficult to do this.  It is during these times that I feel separate from the person I would like to be.  For example:  I have a vision of myself as a writer.  I do write.  I have stashes of notebooks filled with thoughts and ideas.  But, I have not manifested being a writer as part of my external identity.  There is something that happens inside me when I set a plan for my ‘writer self’ to be active.  I get tired.  I get distracted. I feel anxious. I feel disoriented.  I feel VERY resistant to the act of writing. All these are symptoms of being out of my 'center'.  During these times, I am not aware Wisdom is available to guide or inform me. It was only when I sat down to write about my flailing around and feeling like such a failure all day that I was able put anything down on paper.  I gave over to the feelings going on inside. I stopped trying to stop doing what I was doing. I sat down and wrote all the X!$&#! I was feeling . (Good for you I'm not sharing that part).  I was able to write that stuff- I stopped trying not to be what was going on inside me.  I acknowledged and accepted my feelings. It was at this moment I felt an awareness--actually, I felt a kindness come in to my body, I think that this is Wisdom coming in.  I feel I have learned a bit more about Wisdom: She is a companion and she is ready to inform my life. Remembering the advice from January's clan mother-listening with the heart, catching enough stillness to allow what is, is enough for Wisdom to enter. The waxing moon as she grows to fullness reminds me I have this capacity, too.

Much of what we learn of the Truth of who we truly are comes through our relationships with others and our experiences in the world.  Some of what we take in as Truth is false evidence appearing real. Some of what we take as true is future events already ruined. This is the misunderstanding of the instinct of fear.   In the natural world, the instinct of fear is Creator's gift that tells all Creator's creatures to pay attention to what is coming.  That's it.  Just pay attention.  When we learn to pay attention to what is, then we can begin to discern with our all our physical senses; Truth from illusion as it is revealed in our relationships and our experiences. Self Reflection: As we sit in the darkness of the closing moon for the 13th Moon Cycle of Be Truth, we are preparing for January's moon cycle, and the gifts of Learn Truth.